The Blocking Assignment Hex of Pharaoh Brown
Pharaoh Brown · IND · TE
“Brown spikes the ball in celebration at the 3-yard line. He was not in the end zone.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Brown's week
- Brown gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Brown will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
89%POTENCY
-19.7PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Brown's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jonathan Taylor
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
- Oronde Gadsden
FAQ
How do I curse Pharaoh Brown in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Pharaoh Brown is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Pharaoh Brown actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.