The Doink Hex of Riley Patterson
Riley Patterson · BAL · K
“Patterson kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Patterson's week
- Patterson will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Patterson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Memphis's biggest rival.
88%POTENCY
-18.6PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A used challenge flag
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Falcons locker room
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Patterson drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Derrick Henry
- Zay Flowers
- Brandon Aubrey
- Mark Andrews
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Ja'Kobi Lane
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Riley Patterson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Riley Patterson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Riley Patterson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.