The Wind Hex of Riley Patterson
Riley Patterson · BAL · K
“Patterson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Memphis's biggest rival.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Patterson's week
- A mysterious flag erases Patterson's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Patterson trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
85%POTENCY
-16.2PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Patterson's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Riley Patterson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Riley Patterson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Riley Patterson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.