The Upright Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Florida State's biggest rival.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald will be perfect on extra points and absolutely nothing else.
- Fitzgerald sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
90%POTENCY
-9.3PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Texans locker room
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
Incantation
Eye of Panthers, tongue of ref,
Bring Panthers down to grief,
Fitzgerald scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.