The Shank Hex of Ryan Fitzgerald
Ryan Fitzgerald · CAR · K
“Fitzgerald attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Fitzgerald's week
- Fitzgerald's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
- Fitzgerald will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
88%POTENCY
-17.1PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- A single Colts jersey, ironically worn
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Double, double, toil and trouble,
Fitzgerald's stat line, now a rubble,
Inactive by kickoff, pop that bubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Tetairoa McMillan
- Chuba Hubbard
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Bryce Young
- Jalen Coker
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Ryan Fitzgerald in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ryan Fitzgerald is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ryan Fitzgerald actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.