The Intentional Grounding Hex of Sam Darnold
Sam Darnold · SEA · QB
“Coach will call 4 straight handoffs inside the 5. For Darnold, the end zone is a rumor.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Darnold's week
- Darnold is already "Out" with that quadriceps. The witch only has to push gently.
- Darnold will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
76%POTENCY
-12PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Darnold drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Josh Allen
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- Jadarian Price
FAQ
How do I curse Sam Darnold in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam Darnold is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam Darnold actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.