The Chip-and-Release Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.” — Baba Blitz
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Iowa's biggest rival.
- The broadcast shows LaPorta on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.
84%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
LaPorta's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.