The Mystery Tweak Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
- LaPorta gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
91%POTENCY
-17.4PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A single tear from a Eagles fan
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
LaPorta's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.