The Late Scratch Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“A localized thunderstorm forms over LaPorta's stadium. Only over LaPorta.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta has his best game ever, but it is for the opposing fantasy manager in another league.
- LaPorta stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
86%POTENCY
-13.8PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make LaPorta's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.