The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“A localized thunderstorm forms over LaPorta's stadium. Only over LaPorta.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Iowa's biggest rival.
- LaPorta scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
75%POTENCY
-10.8PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
- A single tear from a Panthers fan
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
Incantation
Eye of Falcons, tongue of ref,
Bring Lions down to grief,
LaPorta scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.