The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Sam LaPorta
Sam LaPorta · DET · TE
“LaPorta sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins LaPorta's week
- LaPorta gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Iowa's biggest rival.
- LaPorta's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
88%POTENCY
-13.7PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make LaPorta's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Tyler Warren
- Jameson Williams
- Jared Goff
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
FAQ
How do I curse Sam LaPorta in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Sam LaPorta is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Sam LaPorta actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.