The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Theo Johnson
Theo Johnson · NYG · TE
“Johnson sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Penn State's biggest rival.
- Johnson is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
90%POTENCY
-15.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single tear from a Browns fan
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
Incantation
Johnson, Johnson, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Malik Nabers
- Colston Loveland
- Cam Skattebo
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Theo Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Theo Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Theo Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.