The Chip-and-Release Hex of Theo Johnson
Theo Johnson · NYG · TE
“Johnson stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson runs a perfect route, gets wide open, and is ignored in a way that feels personal.
- Johnson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Penn State's biggest rival.
87%POTENCY
-16.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Johnson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Malik Nabers
- Colston Loveland
- Cam Skattebo
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Theo Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Theo Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Theo Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.