The Chip-and-Release Hex of Theo Johnson
Theo Johnson · NYG · TE
“A localized thunderstorm forms over Johnson's stadium. Only over Johnson.” — Mother Matchup
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Johnson lines up as a tackle on 61% of snaps. A beautiful new career for him.
85%POTENCY
-11.9PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A single tear from a Jets fan
Incantation
Eye of Vikings, tongue of ref,
Bring Giants down to grief,
Johnson scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Malik Nabers
- Colston Loveland
- Cam Skattebo
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Theo Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Theo Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Theo Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.