The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Theo Johnson
Theo Johnson · NYG · TE
“Johnson sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.
- Ref: "Number Johnson, that's a flag." Johnson: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
73%POTENCY
-18.9PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Johnson, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Malik Nabers
- Colston Loveland
- Cam Skattebo
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- George Kittle
- Dalton Kincaid
FAQ
How do I curse Theo Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Theo Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Theo Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.