The Goal-Line Vulture Hex of Aaron Jones Sr.
Aaron Jones Sr. · MIN · RB
“Jones Sr. will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Jones Sr.'s week
- Jones Sr. finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Jones Sr. gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.
73%POTENCY
-9.1PTS DRAINED
Eye-Roll MaterialVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Jones Sr.'s Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Justin Jefferson
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
FAQ
How do I curse Aaron Jones Sr. in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Aaron Jones Sr. is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Aaron Jones Sr. actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.