The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Andre Szmyt
Andre Szmyt · CLE · K
“Szmyt is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Szmyt's week
- The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Szmyt is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.
- Szmyt gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Syracuse's biggest rival.
90%POTENCY
-12.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Szmyt's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Quinshon Judkins
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Brandon Aubrey
- KC Concepcion Jr.
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Dylan Sampson
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Denzel Boston
FAQ
How do I curse Andre Szmyt in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Andre Szmyt is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Andre Szmyt actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.