The Garbage-Time Hex of Arizona Cardinals
Arizona Cardinals defense
“The Cardinals defense is "disguising coverages". The disguise is a clown nose. Fully see-through.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Arizona Cardinals defense's week
- The Cardinals defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.
- The Cardinals offense turns it over 4 times in their own territory. The defense is simply tired.
76%POTENCY
-10PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Cardinals's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Carson Beck
- Chad Ryland
- Tavien Feaster
- Simi Fehoko
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Arizona Cardinals defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Arizona Cardinals defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Arizona Cardinals defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.