The Late Scratch Hex of Arizona Cardinals
Arizona Cardinals defense
“The Cardinals defense allows a kick returner to run 98 yards. He has a hip flexor. He was walking.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Arizona Cardinals defense's week
- The Cardinals defense is gashed by a QB who has not thrown a TD all year. His mom is in the stands.
- The Cardinals defense gets a pick-six called back for a penalty on... the defense. In the end zone.
83%POTENCY
-14PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Cardinals's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Trey McBride
- Tyler Allgeier
- Carson Beck
- Chad Ryland
- Tavien Feaster
- Simi Fehoko
- Houston Texans
- New England Patriots
- Baltimore Ravens
- Pittsburgh Steelers
- Indianapolis Colts
- Seattle Seahawks
FAQ
How do I curse Arizona Cardinals defense in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Arizona Cardinals defense is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Arizona Cardinals defense actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.