The Goal-Line Vulture Hex of Ben VanSumeren
Ben VanSumeren · KC · RB
“VanSumeren gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Michigan State's biggest rival.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins VanSumeren's week
- VanSumeren will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- VanSumeren gets 3 yards per carry and one 2-yard catch on a screen. Efficient. In a sad way.
91%POTENCY
-17.9PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
VanSumeren drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Ben VanSumeren in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ben VanSumeren is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ben VanSumeren actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.