The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen gets the ball 4 times inside the 10. The pylon, however, is fine.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.
- Allen's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
73%POTENCY
-14.5PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Allen drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.