The Garbage-Time Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen rushes 22 times for 51 yards. A heroic, beautiful, useless day.
- Allen will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
83%POTENCY
-19.2PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Allen, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.