The Stuffed Run Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen sees a depth chart rewrite 11 minutes before kickoff. His name is now in smaller font.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Ref: "Number Allen, that's a flag." Allen: "What flag?" Ref: "The one on the previous TD."
- Allen gets "rested" in a week the team clinched nothing.
87%POTENCY
-18.2PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Allen, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.