The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen gets stuffed so hard the broadcast shows a replay in slow motion, from three angles.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Allen gets the ball 4 times inside the 10. The pylon, however, is fine.
86%POTENCY
-11.1PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
Incantation
Allen, Allen, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.