The Garbage-Time Hex of Braelon Allen
Braelon Allen · NYJ · RB
“Allen's offensive line takes the day off. Spiritually.” — Granny Gridiron
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen rushes 22 times for 51 yards. A heroic, beautiful, useless day.
- Allen gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Wisconsin's biggest rival.
85%POTENCY
-11PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
Allen, Allen, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Braelon Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Braelon Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Braelon Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.