The Hamstring Hex of Brandon Aubrey
Brandon Aubrey · DAL · K
“Aubrey gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Notre Dame's biggest rival.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Aubrey's week
- Aubrey finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
- Aubrey is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
92%POTENCY
-12.8PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
Incantation
Aubrey, Aubrey, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Jake Ferguson
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Brandon Aubrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brandon Aubrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brandon Aubrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.