The Inactive-at-11:58 Hex of Brandon Aubrey
Brandon Aubrey · DAL · K
“Aubrey gets 2 attempts, both blocked by someone who is not even tall.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Aubrey's week
- Aubrey will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Aubrey is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
80%POTENCY
-10.6PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- An unused timeout (still warm)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Aubrey's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Jake Ferguson
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Brandon Aubrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brandon Aubrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brandon Aubrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.