The Hamstring Hex of Brandon Aubrey
Brandon Aubrey · DAL · K
“Aubrey gets benched in a blowout at halftime. The team then comes back. He watches. Smiling.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Aubrey's week
- Aubrey is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- The broadcast shows Aubrey on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.
73%POTENCY
-13.1PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Aubrey, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Jake Ferguson
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Brandon Aubrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brandon Aubrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brandon Aubrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.