The Wide Left Hex of Brandon Aubrey
Brandon Aubrey · DAL · K
“The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Aubrey is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Aubrey's week
- Aubrey attempts a field goal, the holder pulls it back, and gets sacked at the 12. Points: 0. Dignity: also 0.
- Aubrey scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
80%POTENCY
-11.7PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Giants locker room
- A used challenge flag
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
Aubrey drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- CeeDee Lamb
- George Pickens
- Javonte Williams
- Dak Prescott
- Jake Ferguson
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Evan McPherson
FAQ
How do I curse Brandon Aubrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brandon Aubrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brandon Aubrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.