The Chip-and-Release Hex of Brenden Bates
Brenden Bates · JAX · TE
“Bates gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates gets a stat correction that takes away 2.4 points, 4 days later, at 3:17 AM.
- Bates is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.
89%POTENCY
-18.8PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Patriots locker room
- A single tear from a Eagles fan
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Bates drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Colston Loveland
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bhayshul Tuten
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
- Parker Washington
- Brian Thomas Jr.
FAQ
How do I curse Brenden Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brenden Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brenden Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.