The Late Scratch Hex of Brian Thomas Jr.
Brian Thomas Jr. · JAX · WR
“Thomas Jr. will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Thomas Jr.'s week
- Thomas Jr. will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
- A mysterious flag erases Thomas Jr.'s only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
73%POTENCY
-11.1PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Thomas Jr.'s Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jaxon Smith-Njigba
- CeeDee Lamb
- Justin Jefferson
- A.J. Brown
- Drake London
- Nico Collins
- George Pickens
- Malik Nabers
- Chris Olave
- Rashee Rice
FAQ
How do I curse Brian Thomas Jr. in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Brian Thomas Jr. is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Brian Thomas Jr. actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.