The Upright Hex of Cairo Santos
Cairo Santos · CHI · K
“The crowd chants "WIDE LEFT" for Santos. Santos does not ignore it. Neither does the ball.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins Santos's week
- At 35, Santos is already part dust. The witch has almost no work to do.
- Santos is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.
90%POTENCY
-13.9PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- The last good thing your opponent said about their lineup
Incantation
Eye of Cowboys, tongue of ref,
Bring Bears down to grief,
Santos scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Caleb Williams
- Colston Loveland
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
FAQ
How do I curse Cairo Santos in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Cairo Santos is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Cairo Santos actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.