The Goal-Line Vulture Hex of Christian McCaffrey
Christian McCaffrey · SF · RB
“McCaffrey is hit with a "pre-existing condition" that was not pre-existing until just now.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins McCaffrey's week
- McCaffrey gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Stanford's biggest rival.
- McCaffrey will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
72%POTENCY
-16.6PTS DRAINED
Sunday RuinerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
McCaffrey's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
- Josh Jacobs
FAQ
How do I curse Christian McCaffrey in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Christian McCaffrey is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Christian McCaffrey actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.