The Late Scratch Hex of Colston Loveland
Colston Loveland · CHI · TE
“Loveland gets a 40-yard pass, then immediately "adjusts his gloves" and is injured. Tragic.” — Sister Sack
More ways the witch ruins Loveland's week
- Loveland stays in to block all game. A bold use of a fantasy asset.
- Loveland is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
81%POTENCY
-10.4PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The playbook your coordinator definitely lost
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Colts locker room
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Loveland's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Brock Bowers
- Trey McBride
- Caleb Williams
- Luther Burden III
- D'Andre Swift
- Tyler Warren
- Sam LaPorta
- Kyle Monangai
- Rome Odunze
- Harold Fannin Jr.
- Tucker Kraft
- Kyle Pitts Sr.
FAQ
How do I curse Colston Loveland in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Colston Loveland is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Colston Loveland actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.