The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of D'Andre Swift
D'Andre Swift · CHI · RB
“Swift will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Swift's week
- Swift will be in the end zone. With the ball. And the whistle already blown. Dead ball.
- Swift gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Georgia's biggest rival.
73%POTENCY
-16.2PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- A single sock, mismatched, from the Cardinals locker room
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make Swift's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse D'Andre Swift in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If D'Andre Swift is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing D'Andre Swift actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.