The Fumble Hex of Dylan Sampson
Dylan Sampson · CLE · RB
“Sampson gets 3 yards per carry and one 2-yard catch on a screen. Efficient. In a sad way.” — Lady Last-Minute Scratch
More ways the witch ruins Sampson's week
- Sampson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
- Sampson finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
87%POTENCY
-16.4PTS DRAINED
Delete the AppVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Sampson's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Dylan Sampson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dylan Sampson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dylan Sampson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.