The Stuffed Run Hex of Dylan Sampson
Dylan Sampson · CLE · RB
“Sampson runs for 98 yards, one short of the bonus, then goes down on the kneel-down. Scorched.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins Sampson's week
- Sampson gets the ball 4 times inside the 10. The pylon, however, is fine.
- Sampson gets stuffed so hard the broadcast shows a replay in slow motion, from three angles.
85%POTENCY
-11.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A screenshot of your opponent's trash talk, face down
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
O ancient spirits of the lost challenge flag,
Take Sampson's points and put them in a bag,
Leave only a "DNP" and a sad little shrug.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Kyren Williams
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FAQ
How do I curse Dylan Sampson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Dylan Sampson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Dylan Sampson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.