The Shank Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.” — Hexcellent Hilda
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- McPherson will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
75%POTENCY
-16.9PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
McPherson drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.