The Wide Left Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Nana Nickelback
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- McPherson gets 2 attempts, both blocked by someone who is not even tall.
87%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
- The last HD stream that wasn't buffering
- A fumbled football, blessed by nobody
- Powdered kicker confidence
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
McPherson drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.