The Doink Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson gets one attempt: a 63-yarder into a headwind. Wide left. 0 points. 1 tear.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.
- A mysterious flag erases McPherson's only good play. The ref will not make eye contact.
81%POTENCY
-11.8PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A cup of hot cocoa, spilled on the depth chart
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- One (1) lucky coin, flipped incorrectly
Incantation
Spirits of the checkdown past,
Make McPherson's Sunday dim and vast,
One yard short. The die is cast.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
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- Chris Boswell
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FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.