The Late Scratch Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.” — The Hex-Pert
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.
- McPherson is on the field for exactly 38% of snaps in a "rotation" only the coach understands.
79%POTENCY
-16.2PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A shred of a Week 1 waiver wire pickup who is now a Bills fan
Incantation
McPherson, McPherson, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.