The Shank Hex of Evan McPherson
Evan McPherson · CIN · K
“McPherson finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins McPherson's week
- McPherson gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Florida's biggest rival.
- McPherson kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.
77%POTENCY
-19.5PTS DRAINED
Seriously CursedVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A suspicious amount of glitter and a printed injury report
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Newt and bat and gridiron dust,
McPherson drops one, as all fantasy must,
Questionable by noon, in the witch we trust.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Ja'Marr Chase
- Chase Brown
- Joe Burrow
- Tee Higgins
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Mevis
FAQ
How do I curse Evan McPherson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Evan McPherson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Evan McPherson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.