The Doink Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates tweaks something in warm-ups. He'll be fine. He will also score zero.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Bates will be "questionable" by Sunday morning, "inactive" by 11:58 AM, and "seen at brunch" by Monday.
- Bates gets 2 attempts, both blocked by someone who is not even tall.
74%POTENCY
-18.4PTS DRAINED
Season WobblerVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- your opponent's lucky socks (unwashed since Week 1)
- One hair from a referee who "didn't see it"
- A single tear from a Browns fan
Incantation
Bates, Bates, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Butker
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.