The Late Scratch Hex of Jake Bates
Jake Bates · DET · K
“Bates scores 0 fantasy points and is somehow also responsible for 2 turnovers.” — Mistress Misfire
More ways the witch ruins Bates's week
- Coach goes for it on 4th-and-2 every time Bates trots out. He watches from the bench like a retiree.
- The wind in the stadium is 22 mph. Bates is aware. The ball is aware. Only the ball cares.
91%POTENCY
-17.3PTS DRAINED
Group Chat FuneralVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The ashes of a 2019 draft pick
- A forgotten fantasy trophy from 2014
- A scorched fantasy football magazine, September issue
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
Incantation
By the pale blue light of the injury tag,
Bates, hear me, and start to lag,
Your best play is a flag. Your worst is the bag.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Amon-Ra St. Brown
- Jameson Williams
- Sam LaPorta
- Jared Goff
- Brandon Aubrey
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Ka'imi Fairbairn
- Cam Little
- Chris Boswell
- Harrison Butker
FAQ
How do I curse Jake Bates in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Jake Bates is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Jake Bates actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.