The Kneel-Down Hex of Josh Allen
Josh Allen · BUF · QB
“The broadcast shows Allen on the sideline with an ice pack for the entire 4th quarter.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets hit on the arm in the first quarter and "plays through it" at 41% accuracy.
- Coach will call 4 straight handoffs inside the 5. For Allen, the end zone is a rumor.
89%POTENCY
-17.6PTS DRAINED
Call an ExorcistVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A single sock, mismatched, from the 49ers locker room
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Allen drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- James Cook III
- Drake Maye
- Joe Burrow
- Caleb Williams
- Jayden Daniels
- Justin Herbert
- Dak Prescott
- Patrick Mahomes
- Trevor Lawrence
- Bo Nix
- DJ Moore
- Brock Purdy
FAQ
How do I curse Josh Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Josh Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Josh Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.