The Gone-in-the-Fourth Hex of Kaelon Black
Kaelon Black · SF · RB
“Black is a game-time decision, and the decision is made by a poltergeist.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Black's week
- Rookie Black gets the traditional hazing: the "Welcome to the League" curse.
- Black finishes with 4.2 points. Not 4.0. Not 5.0. The single most insulting number.
80%POTENCY
-12.1PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- The echo of a referee saying "no catch"
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
Incantation
Eye of Jets, tongue of ref,
Bring 49ers down to grief,
Black scores zero, past belief!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Kaelon Black in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kaelon Black is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kaelon Black actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.