The Shank Hex of Ka'imi Fairbairn
Ka'imi Fairbairn · HOU · K
“A localized thunderstorm forms over Fairbairn's stadium. Only over Fairbairn.” — Auntie Audible
More ways the witch ruins Fairbairn's week
- Fairbairn's best play of the day happens on a play where he is not the ball carrier.
- Fairbairn kicks a perfect ball into the end zone... and it is a kickoff. For the other team.
92%POTENCY
-18.6PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- The soul of a QB who threw to the wrong team
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- Dust from a defunct team's playbook (the Browns, probably)
- A dash of Week 17 resting-starters
Incantation
By horn of fumbled ball,
By sack that drops them all,
Fairbairn, drop it, trip it, fall!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Brandon Aubrey
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Ka'imi Fairbairn in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ka'imi Fairbairn is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ka'imi Fairbairn actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.