The Late Scratch Hex of Ka'imi Fairbairn
Ka'imi Fairbairn · HOU · K
“Fairbairn hits the upright twice, then the other upright, then somehow the crossbar from the side.” — The Old Crone of the Red Zone
More ways the witch ruins Fairbairn's week
- Fairbairn will do something so quietly mediocre that the box score doubts he played.
- Fairbairn's only highlight is a block, and it is not even a good one.
82%POTENCY
-9.7PTS DRAINED
Needs a PriestVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a "Questionable" tag
- An unused timeout (still warm)
- One (1) pre-owned hamstring
Incantation
Hocus pocus, fumble focus,
Fairbairn's snap count, now a locust,
Waiver wire, hear my notice!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Nico Collins
- David Montgomery
- Marvin Harrison Jr.
- Brandon Aubrey
- Dalton Schultz
- C.J. Stroud
- Woody Marks
- Cameron Dicker
- Jason Myers
- Cam Little
- Jake Bates
- Chris Boswell
FAQ
How do I curse Ka'imi Fairbairn in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Ka'imi Fairbairn is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Ka'imi Fairbairn actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.