The Garbage-Time Hex of Kaleb Johnson
Kaleb Johnson · GB · RB
“Johnson goes down with a "tweak" in a game that was already won. Never even needed him.” — Zelda the Zero-Pointer
More ways the witch ruins Johnson's week
- Johnson's offensive line takes the day off. Spiritually.
- Johnson loses 11 yards on a toss sweep. The most creative loss of the season.
89%POTENCY
-11.7PTS DRAINED
Total MeltdownVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Powdered tears from a kicker who "was fine" at practice
- A tablespoon of "I told you so" (aged 7 years)
- The dying breath of a waiver claim
- The sacred tears of a #1 waiver priority
Incantation
Johnson, Johnson, in the pale moonlight,
May your target share shrink out of sight,
And may the ref not see your catch tonight.
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Kaleb Johnson in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kaleb Johnson is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kaleb Johnson actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.