The Kneel-Down Heartbreak Hex of Kaytron Allen
Kaytron Allen · MIA · RB
“Allen gets stuffed on 3rd-and-1, 4th-and-1, and the goal line. Vulture season is here.” — Aunt Prevent
More ways the witch ruins Allen's week
- Allen gets chased around the field all game by the mascot of Penn State's biggest rival.
- A localized thunderstorm forms over Allen's stadium. Only over Allen.
72%POTENCY
-18.3PTS DRAINED
Ruined BrunchVERDICT
Ritual ingredients
- Smoke from a burning depth chart
- A bag of cold gas-station nachos
- One bottle of luck. Empty. Recycled.
- A bottle of "I'm not superstitious" (it's empty)
Incantation
Bubble, bubble, benched in trouble,
Allen drops it, double, double,
Hex, hex, hex, and the stat sheet's rubble!
🔮 Hex my real fantasy opponent
Hex someone else
- Jahmyr Gibbs
- Bijan Robinson
- Christian McCaffrey
- Jonathan Taylor
- James Cook III
- Derrick Henry
- Saquon Barkley
- Omarion Hampton
- Ashton Jeanty
- Kyren Williams
- Chase Brown
- Kenneth Walker III
FAQ
How do I curse Kaytron Allen in fantasy football?
Read the hex below, send it to your league chat, or use Fantasy Witch to curse your real matchup. If Kaytron Allen is on your opponent's roster, the witch picks the victim for you.
Will cursing Kaytron Allen actually work?
No. It is for trash talk and entertainment. But if it does work, we would like credit.